does what happen in vegas stay in vegas?

Now, just because I have been in Kansas for the past four days doesn't mean it has been drama free. Although I must say, I LOVE Overland Park. I would move here in a second if offered a job. It is gorgeous, a very North Chicago look and feel without the attitude.

The training has been great, much better than the last one. The worst part about this trip is the corporate card, with the sixty day per diem, we have been eating well. Without the gym and yoga, it will be a long week ahead of me when I return.

I am not sure if I blogged this before I left, but I spoke with my dad Friday night. It was a very heated discussion at times, but I stood my ground, and validated my reasons. When he told me I was "abandoning Hannah" I just about lost it on him. I told him flat out, you of all people do not have the right to say that to me. He knows why.

I then told him how some of the things Larry does and says just bring out feelings of watching my mom trapped in with Tom. Financially, mentally, and physically. It is not something I am willing to loose my sanity for.

I threw in a few "and then he did this (meaning Tom)" and I could hear him cringe. I know it devestates him to hear what we went through. He told me again how he tried to get us out, and I know he did. Twenty five years ago, a mother had to leave you out on the street, for months at a time to have a judge even remotely think about giving a father his kids.

There were tears and some tense words, but I know he cares about me, and loves me, and I know that.

Saturday there was lots of running around with Hannah. Last minute shampoo, toothpaste, etc. I listened to her. They are never home on weekends, they go all kinds of places because they are bored. She talked about the car she is going to get. In March. When he gets his bonus. It was rough.

I packed up, picked up my best guy friend and we set off for a week of 60 per day, 9-4:30 days, and fun nights. And they have been.

Monday night I get a phone call from my stepmother. The first thing she says is, "everything is ok, and it's going to be ok". Two things enter my mind. My dad is upset with me about the talk, or something has happened. It was the latter. He was thrown from a horse. They run a bed and breakfast in the hill country, and he is a big ol cowboy that gives horse rides. He got off the horse to show the couple some local plant life, tried to get back on, something must have pulled the horses stomach, and off he went. The horse AND my Dad. He has compression fractures, flat on his back for two weeks minimum. I feel awful for him. But sooooo grateful he is OK.

Later that same evening as we were on our way to dinner (a bbq joint who happens to have the best baked beans I have EVER tasted in my life), my sister calls. She asked if I had talked with Ash, no, why? Seems she called looking for Larry and sounded a little distraught. I asked why, and Autumn said she thinks his (larrys)grandmother died. Wow. OK. I call Ash, yes, she did die (much better off now, her quality of life was minimal at best). He told Ash via a text message.

I held out until after dinner, and after we got the hotel before I had to call him. I couldn't believe he didn't call me. I also let him know the results of my last exam.

We hung up, and that was that. Until yesterday. I got a text message from him telling me Happy Valentines day, and how would I like to go to Vegas in April. What? Where did this come from? I replied, I am in training and will call you later.

I did, he was taking Hannah out to dinner. We really couldn't talk. He called me back later and a series of uncomfortable questions came later. I won't have to pay, he knows I like Vegas, and misses not doing things with me. He stopped short of saying "I want you to come home". He is going for a conference, has a free room and thought I may like to go. Yes, I was glad he offered, but the business trip part kind of spoiled it for me.

He took me to Vegas for my 30th. The first year we really had money to do anything of substance. I was hoping he remembered that, and wanted to rekindle, not so much, but hey, it was an effort. Then he said Hannah wants to go too. OK, yeah, there is a ton of stuff to do in Vegas with kids, so, was/is it that he wants to bring Hannah and needs a chaperone, or does he want us all there? I don't know, and by this point we had made our way to the casinos, and it was getting loud.

My employees are at their lowest. I am not there to sooth them, but I am getting re-energized to motivate when I return.

I am very, very tired, but in that good way. Peacefully tired. Except for one little thing. My mini cooper is in. And I have finally realized I can't afford it. I am very disappointed, but I will get over it.

So, the irony of Larry asking me to go to Vegas while I was in a casino struck me. If I go, will it stay that way?