little steps & one is all it takes

Last night, I went to pick Hannah up for dinner. I have been being so good as far as the diet goes (not really a diet, just easting better), and had a bad craving for sour cream enchiladas. Not with chicken, with cheese and not with white sauce, but red. I knew just where to go.

PANCHO'S MEXICAN BUFFET!

A totally trashy, borderline ghetto place, but good! I must say, they have, by far, the best sopapallias (sp?) ever! I only had one. I could only eat 1 & 1/2 enchiladas and 1 & 1/2 taquitos. We had a good dinner, I told her not to ever hang up on me again, she said OK, almost like she had been laid into.

When I dropped her off, I went in to ask Larry if he would put my registration sticker on. (My pink tool box does not have a scraper!) I think this may have shocked him, that I actually went to get it. While he was scraping, I asked what is involved with just a title transfer. I want to transfer the Tahoe into my name.

As it stands, he could easily come and take it from me, however I don't think he would ever do that. But all the same. I also asked him to help me with my ticket. Now, fasten your seatbelts folks, because what I am about to tell you is absolutely true.

I am 37. I have been driving for 22 years. I have only had one ticket. one is all it takes. I have only been pulled over three times (including the ticket). The one ticket I got was right outside of Fredericksburg coming home from my Dad's. I gave it to Larry and forgot about it. Forgot about it until he said they added another 200.00 for "failure to appear". Forgot about that too until I could not renew my license.

He told me to get the information together and he would take care of it. He then asked me if I said anything to Hannah about the pictures. There are some pictures I would rather not see on her my space. I sent them to Larry, reminding him to keep an eye on the website. They aren't really bad, per se, but suggestive all the same. I told him no, I did not speak to her about it. I reminded him what I had said, I was done making the rules for her. He asked who the boy was, I said I don't know, he didn't like a picture of her kissing a boy in front of him. I told him, as nicely as I could that by the time he finds/found something out, it is going to be bad.

Moms have a way of finding shit out without making it obvious. He did not argue, nor did he reply. He knows I am right. I wasn't about to talk to her about it. It is time for him to step up to the plate and confront her, all by himself. And not just about "her homework".

And then I left.

He asked for all the info on the ticket & transfer. I found the title info last night and got my ticket info this morning. I sent him the pdf files for transferring the title and the information on the ticket. He agreed to transfer the title to me. little step.

In the process, he asked me why I wanted it. He stated that you couldn't get a cheaper car payment than paid off and insurance paid as well. I agreed, but it has not been maintained the way it should have been (do you see a pattern yet?), it knocks, it grinds, it makes a weird noise when I turn a corner), so I told him if it needs a lot of work, I would rather trade it in and get something much smaller and lighter. I also added that with it in his name, he could come and take it at will.

He asked what had he done to make me think he would take it. He stated he has actually done the opposite. Signing my lease, buying my mattress, my brakes, and now my ticket. and "now my ticket".

I replied quite calmly with a very simple statement.

The reason you have had to do these things for me is the very thing I have been banging my head about. My credit has not been addressed, (his is perfect), nothing is in my name, and I do not and have not made the money for all of those things. I told him I knew it would be hard on me when I left, and that should have proved I wasn't just there for the money. I asked, can we just do this one thing without arguing or justifying? Are we arguing to make a difference, or just to argue? I think he finally got it.

He replied just as simply.

I will transfer the truck, it' no big deal.
I'm not trying to make anything difficult.
I don't think you stayed for the money.
We are arguing because we are both trying to get the other to acknowledge our feelings and view of the situation.
I did not get the money order at lunch but will defiantly get it before I get home.

The ticket must be paid in a money order. Five lines, simple. I would like to think he gets it. I would like to think everything would be and will be OK. I would like to think none of this ever happened.

Let me thank all of you who have called, emailed and commented. I just have to put it out there, not only to get it out of me, but to have an actual record of the events. In the high drama, things get fuzzy. I write to remember, to document, and to release. I truly appreciate each and every one of you.

I do.